I was up late last night wrestling with the idea of spiritual warfare, a battle I cannot see but know that I am actively involved in. I am beginning to see, ever so slightly, how Satan uses my weaknesses, my blindspots, my pride, my selfishness and worldly desires to wear me down and play a part in my sin. The responsibility for my actions are mine but I believe there is another force that is stronger than me pushing me towards those bad decisions. The sad thing is, there is a force even stronger than me or evil that I could call on – if only I would.
A man in our community was arrested yesterday for a hideous crime. I don’t know whether it is valid or not but the fact is that the information is circulating that he did this. He’s an acquaintance of mine and I have always thought of him as a good man. He has raised good children, he’s always nice and I know many people he has helped. Yet, it would appear he made a grave mistake and it is something that will haunt him and hurt him for years to come. Evil forces were at work on him finding his weakness and exploiting it. Yet the battle of evil doesn’t stop there. Satan will use this to take on others, people who will treat this man like Satan wants them to treat him, not how Christ would want him treated. The battle is on.
I am a weak, sinful creature. I do not understand why God continues to have mercy on me but I believe He does. I believe He loves me unconditionally and gives me strength that I cannot imagine if I will take hold of it. I am a wreck but He uses amazing grace to carry me forward. The only way I can overcome the forces of darkness, the only way I will win the battle here and today is to live in the knowledge that God loves me no matter how weak I am, no matter how sinful I am, no matter how wretched I am. He will give me the love I need and the strength that comes with it to win the battle if I will only reach out for Him.
There is a battle raging today. It’s a battle for your heart and my heart. Two forces are at war for how we will treat each other, how we will see each other, how we will respond to each other. Far too often, I have sided with the wrong force, done the wrong thing, made the wrong decisions. Today, I pray for the strength to join forces with the one who has already won the decisive victory so that I can win the battle today.