I grew up thinking I was failing if I wasn’t perfect. I would not try things if I didn’t think I could do it correctly, the first time I tried it. I put myself down when I failed. I felt shame. I learned self-deprecation as a defense mechanism. I worried far too much about being perfect. Throw in my religious upbringing with “you are not good enough” and perfectionism drove me to some dark places. I’m sure I have said some things to my kids I wish I could take back about being perfect. I just want them to be them.
Brene Brown has some good things to think about on perfectionism. I’ll share and shut up.
Grace and peace.