Those are two powerful words. Said flippantly, they can create wounds that continue to fester. Said sincerely, they bring peace, relief and hope.
After one of the most difficult, painful, heart-wrenching weeks I have faced in some time, I had a conversation that included “I’m sorry for…” I was sorry for putting my hopes and expectations on someone else without doing a good job of communicating why I hoped for what I did and how we could be on common ground. I also received an apology addressing the issue that was sincere and it was amazing what it did for me.
In the past, when expressing my concerns, I was met with resistance, defensiveness and a reminder of my weaknesses whether real or perceived. Saturday, I was met with listening, calm conversation, mutual discussion and a desire to understand and work towards a better answer in the future. And, “I’m sorry for…”
To know someone cares enough to apologize for a misunderstanding is very meaningful to me. No one did anything that was wrong. It was all based on some past baggage. That didn’t matter. We both realize the baggage isn’t something we can’t just walk away from without some time and trust. We also both realize that we have to be aware of the other person’s hurts, wounds, fears and hopes for the future. And, we were both sorry for the way things happened and not just sorry but also agreeing to work together to make improvements in the future.
I’m not used to receiving an apology and the power of getting one was incredible.
I’m so thankful for a woman who sees more deeply into relationship than a misspoken word or hurtful action. I’m so thankful for a woman who looks into the future at what can be through growth and all that comes with it to imagine what a relationship can become.
I’m so thankful I am learning too. It isn’t easy to put my heart on the line and give trust where the wounds of pain still exist. I’ve got a ways to go but I’m learning and living and hoping and trusting.
Grace and peace.